Purpose FAIL

I submitted a manuscript a few weeks ago and when I checked the mail today it had come back to me unopened. The address I sent it to did not exist.
No huge deal. I'll just call up the company and see if they changed PO boxes...but I must confess to feeling let down.
Oddly enough I think even a rejection letter would have felt better, at least then these past weeks of anticipation would have led to some sort of communication.
Alas, they did not.
Some people have a philosophy of "waiting for God to point them in a direction."
I've always thought better to let God, or the Universe or the Aliens or whoever you think is in charge of fate, tell you "no" instead of waiting for a "yes."
It seems like I've had a lot of "no" lately. My old pastor used to say that some things are "of The Devil" some things are "of the Holy Spirit" and some things are "of Daffy Duck." I think I finally understand.
I'm not complaining, only pondering.
I'm not sure if it's because my ideas and plans are doofy or if it's because I truly have a purpose that I just haven't found yet.
I wonder if that purpose is time sensitive. Am I supposed to fail at everything else because I'm supposed to be at home with Penny right now? Will I stop failing when Penny starts school? Or graduates high school? Will I stop failing when my ideas get better. Is this just dumb luck? The economy? Or is it me....
My goodness this is sounding a little pathetic.
A month ago I applied for a baby sitting job at a community center. 3 hours a day. I worked special ed for 2 years in the public schools in Portland...I didn't get the job because they had found someone whose skills were a "Better Fit" for the position.

I think I hate fail blog so much because I'm afraid one day I'm going to look at it and see my picture posted with FAIL scrolled across my forehead.
I can just picture the end of my life being like one of those terrible Lifetime TV Movies where at the end the old lady on her deathbed sits and holds her daughter's hand and says, "The one thing I got right in life was you."
I don't want to be that lady. I don't want Penny to have that mom, or Charlie to have that wife.
So how do you get out of a rut when every plan you make runs you head first into a wall?
Not complaining, just pondering.